Mary had a little lamb
His fleece was black as soot
And everywhere that Mary went
His sooty foot he put
I don't remember whether it was my piano teacher or one of my grandparents who shared that rhyme with me when I was a child, but now I need to modify it:
Kristen had a little dog
Her fur got caked with cinders
And when Kristen brought this dog inside
She had to go straight into the bathtub
(I know - it doesn't rhyme. You think of a word pertaining to "bathtub" that rhymes with "cinders." I dare you.)
It was supposed to be a leisurely morning. I had an eye appointment, which meant I had to take the morning off and not go to school until noon. But since the appointment wasn't until ten, I got to sleep in. When I did get up, I decided to go running. Mystic and I had been out running the night before and she didn't get too dirty on the roads, so today we headed out on a different road.
Along the way I was considering what I should eat for breakfast and how to fashionably style my hair. When we got back I noticed her belly looked a little dirty (which is saying something, considering that her fur is BLACK) and when I tried to wipe it off with an old towel, I realized that a bath was needed...immediately...preferably before she stepped on, laid on, looked at, or breathed on anything in the house. So I hauled her upstairs.
Mystic isn't stupid. She knew what was coming. The whole time I ran water in the bathtub, she cowered in the corner. She was crouched so low, her head was on the floor. I would've felt sympathy for her, but what were my alternatives? Let her roam around the house and spread black cinders everywhere? I doubt she'd have been very sympathetic if I had to shampoo, oh, let's say, EVERY UPHOLSTERED SURFACE IN THE HOUSE.
The bath went uneventfully. She got clean. We used up the very last of the bottle of shampoo that I bought when she was just a puppy (*sniff*) and, as is her custom, she jumped out of the tub and shook water all over the bathroom. I commenced letting the water out of the extremely slow bathtub drain and headed to my room to get my clothes so I could shower. What should greet my wondering eyes there but the sight of my very wet dog relaxing on my bed - on my down comforter, in the midst of what was now a dog-shaped wet spot. (This, by the way, is why I insisted on purchasing a duvet cover when I bought the down comforter even though the cover cost almost as much as the comforter itself.) I unbuttoned the duvet cover and tossed it into the hall.
By this time the tub was finally almost drained, so after cleaning cinders and black dog hair out of the tub, I finally got to take a shower. time I got done it was 9:45, and my dreams of a nutritious breakfast and a stylish hairdo were quickly reduced to a mouthful of toothpaste and a scrunchie-wrapped bun as I ran out the door...so that I could sit and wait for half an hour to be seen by the eye doctor. Afterward, I went to the pet store to buy dog shampoo - and while I was at it, a new collar and leash to replace the blackened ones, and also some better-quality dog food which is supposed to reduce shedding and itchy winter doggy skin.
They say running is an inexpensive way to exercise. Just buy a decent pair of sneakers and you're on your way...um...you sure about that?
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